Friday, November 6, 2009

tell-tale heart

secret valentine
At long last: the place where you can ease your conscience by telling us all your guilty secrets. You know you want to.*

As always, the rules are simple and few.

(1) Choose the anonymous comment option. (there are always a few people who fail to do this, so please double check before you hit publish)

(2) Leave your confession in the comments.

(3) If there are enough comments, I'll add a couple of confessions of my own. See if you can guess which ones they are.


And this isn't exactly a confession, but, while I've posted the above photo before, it's become one of my personal faves ever since Charmy pointed out the hidden valentine.


*Well, actually, I know there are some of you who, for reasons that I certainly understand, absolutely hate these confession posts. If you're one of them, just sit this one out and we'll see you on the flip side.

131 comments:

Anonymous said...

I hate these confession threads. I don't even know why I'm participating in this one.

Anonymous said...

I'm addicted to luna bars. Theyre just like candy with a few vitamins added. But mostly theyre like candy. I eat them all day long.

Anonymous said...

oooh cause deep down you like it. lol

Anonymous said...

I have power wreck a marriage, question is do I do it? She so many ppl...

Anonymous said...

anonymous @9:00: Go ahead and do it. I used to be marreied and it really sucked hairy donkey balls. I feel sorry for all those people who are still married. They think everythign is great, but little do they know.

Anonymous said...

You know all those times when your DH calls and says he's really sorry but he's got to work late at the office or go out of town for a few days on a business trip? Guess what? He's lying his azz off.

And that girl who called his mobile and he said it was just a wrong number? It wasn't.

Anonymous said...

I worry that I let my son watch too much tv.

Anonymous said...

My SO tells me he wants a devils 3 way. I'm thinking this is a cover up for him wanting to get with another guy, so I'm telling him to leave me out of it and go all the way for the lucky pierre.

Anonymous said...

I'm disgusted by how fat I am. I've gained so much weight that none of my cloths fit and I look like a gross obese beached whale.

Anonymous said...

I like to trip happy people.

Anonymous said...

I'm going through a tough patch in my marriage. It feels like my husband is my boss instead of my partner. I know we'll get through it, but it sucks right now. I miss him.

Anonymous said...

I confess that I have alot of trouble understanding those who are suffering from infertility, decide that they're going to live childfree but are still upset all the time about it. I think that you can live a great fufilling life if you're childfree, but if it's making you miserable why wouldn't you use one of the other options that could give you a child, even if it's not a biological child. I can understand that some people can't afford it, but if you can, why wouldn't you do it if you're going to spend the rest of your life wishing for a child taht you don't have.

Anonymous said...

^^Anonymous @10:24AM: I think what you're trying to say is "why don't they just adopt"

Anonymous said...

I hate blogs that load music with the blog. I can't seem to find that stop button fast enough.

Anonymous said...

I have an M tatooed on each of my butt cheeks. When I bend over it says MOM. When I stand on my head it says WOW.

Anonymous said...

@11:15

Would you mind doing us all a huge favor and NOT posting a photo.

Kthx!

Anonymous said...

I have one deep dark secret that only a few people know, one of which is my husband.

He was drunk one night and nearly told his mother, in front of me.

I wanted to scream at him. How dare he think that he can just expose my most painful secret to his family.

I wish I could have told him to go fuck himself for even thinking about it. Stupid drunk asshole.

Anonymous said...

The stuff I feel bad about and want to confess are all so mild that I feel like it would be goofy to post them as my darkest secrets.

And the truly bad shit I've done doesn't really bother me that much.

Anonymous said...

I am a chocoholic.

I hide my chocolate so noone else in the house can find it. DH found it one day and threw it out thinking I was giving it to the kids. HECK NO that was MINE!!!

Anonymous said...

Well if tell this "wife" of his he going to just fall apart, but I been hurt so bad over lies and stuff she done to me. I have kept my nouth shut for 5 years. sigh

Anonymous said...

post her email, and I ll tell her for you. :o)

Anonymous said...

I should tell all of you what she done, but it have to wait I have to go to work.

Anonymous said...

I can't wait to find out!

Here's my secret: By looking at his email I found out my husband was having an affair with a married woman. She was using her real name for the emails and one of them was forwarded from someone who I figured out was her husband.

I cut and pasted all of the emails (and many were xxx rated) and emailed them to her husband's email account, using a fake name.

My husband and his girlfriend still have no idea how her husband found out every detail of their affair. :)

Anonymous said...

@ 1:46 - first of all, that's awesome! second, are you still with your husband?

Anonymous said...

@1:46 - Love it.

Anonymous said...

@ 1:53 That depends on exactly what you mean by "with"

If it means "using his credit cards to buy myself expensive stuff" then I guess I am.

Anonymous said...

awesome

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't mind my husband having a romp if it would make him more excited at home. But I never, ever want to hear about it.

Maybe he is having something long term. Maybe that's why sometimes it seems he can't even look at me.

Anonymous said...

When I hear about someone getting divorced, I say all the right thing. "Oh, that's too bad; I hope they'll both be happier now. Blah blah blah blah."

But inside I'm thinking "These assholes can get married and, after 15 years, we can't? Can we have the marriage that they're releasing into the atmosphere by getting divorced?"

Straight people don't appreciate how lucky they are.

Anonymous said...

I'm a pretty happy person, love my career and have a great marriage. My daughter is awesome and I love balancing work and family.

Just thought I'd add a functional, happy post to this depressing thread....especially about those who are cheating on spouses, wrecking marriages, or have been cheated on.

Anonymous said...

@2:57 Or maybe he is TEH GHEY like my hubby. Is he really, really talented at arranging throw pillows? Does he like to stay at the YMCA? If so, look at his internet history. He's probably a regular at m@nhunt dot com or m4m dot com.

Anonymous said...

I feel like I can't catch my breath right now- there is just so much to do, so much going on, so much of my life spinning. I need to do a million things but instead I am watching project runway.

Anonymous said...

Not to offend anyone, but whenever someone says what a great marriage they have I think that they're probably just kidding themselves.

I thought I had a great marriage too, the best out of any of my friends' marriages. Then I found out that my husband was seeing someone else on the side. Don't think it can't happen to you because it can.

Anonymous said...

@3:57 - Not to offend you, but just because it happened to you doesn't mean others can't actually be in a good marriage.

Anonymous said...

oh I'm sure that there are people actually in good marriages. But whenever I hear someone say how good their marriage is I think back to those days when I used to say the exact same thing.

Anonymous said...

I HATE helicopter parents. News flash: your kids do not need you hovering over them. Get a life.

Anonymous said...

I think my sister's low birthweight baby was that way because she wanted to stay thin. I think she's a selfish jerk and shouldn't have had a baby. And that laziness caused her brief foray into breastfeeding to fail.

Anonymous said...

@3:04 p.m. - I'm in an opposite-sex relationship and I never take it for granted how much easier I have it. I'm doing everything I can at this point to help legalize same-sex marriage.

I won't rest until you can get married, too.

Anonymous said...

After I lost my virginity, I was disappointed in how un-different I felt.

It's a bit of a letdown, really.

Anonymous said...

I think parents who don't vaccinate their kids are stupid and selfish.

Stupid because they are risking the health of their kids.

Selfish because their germ ridden kids are passing infections to people who legitimately cannot get vaccinated (like kids with certain allergies or people on chemo, etc).

Anonymous said...

My boss revealed to me the other day that she is in the process of firing a coworker and asked me if I would help make the case with HR. The guy is an asshole and I won't miss him when he's gone, but in this economy, I still feel bad.

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking about ending the toxic relationship I have with my mother and sister. I don't know why I keep going back to them.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I really miss my ex. On the minus side, he was a giant prick. On the plus side, he *had* a giant prick.

Anonymous said...

@3:04 I wish I could give you my marriage. I'm certainly not using it.

Anonymous said...

my life is going down the tubes and i feel like ending my life on a daily basis. i know i can't do that to my family, but i do think about it. it makes me sad to know how selfish it is, because it would be so much easier.

Anonymous said...

@5:38 I've been there. More than once. And I know it doesn't seem that way now, but things will get better. I promise they will.

Anonymous said...

you don't know how much that means @5:50

Anonymous said...

I slept with a guy that I thought i was in love with 4 weeks after his wedding just cause I was pissed at her

Anonymous said...

I think I am bi

Anonymous said...

When I read these confessions and recognize someone's voice, I generally feel like leaving this community and never coming back.

niobe said...

Honestly (and I realize I'm breaking the rules by making this non anonymous), I think that a lot of these confessions are "true" in the sense that they're a reflection of reality, but far from the whole story. It's not that people are lying -- they're just telling a version of the truth that's a little different from the one they usually tell.

Anonymous said...

@4:48, thanks, really. Every time I give into The Bitter I get a reminder of how many good people there are out there.

@5:37, sorry, I know it's not all a bed of roses -- I do hope things look up for your marriage.

Anonymous said...

I dick off a lot at work. Notice now. I love my job and I'm good at it. Blogs keep me very entertained at work. Oh, and Face.book too.

Azaera said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Patients: get over it. You're not going to die from the flu, and neither is your stupid, misbehaved, snotty kid. Stop the little shit from pushing all the elevator buttons, too.

(I like kids, which is the worst part. My job is ruining my perception of humanity.)

Anonymous said...

Right now my life is so overwhelming, so demanding and so fucking upsetting that I have to physically stop myself from just walking out the front door and disappearing.

Telling myself how awful it would be on the kids, DH and the extended family used to keep me from thinking these thoughts.

I am now getting to the point where I just don't care what it does to anyone else. I'm tired. I can't do this anymore. I just want it all to stop.

Anonymous said...

@3:57 is right. People think we have the perfect marriage and I have the perfect husband. Little do they know that I've caught him flirting and sharing porn with ladies online several times. Each time he swears it's the last time and each time I try to move on.

He's basically killed any trust I could have had in him and one part of me will never get over the hurt... but I won't leave him. I'd be too embarassed to tell people why.

Anonymous said...

I've been looking forward to posting my secret!
People would never guess in a million years that me, my husband and our best friends (also a married couple) are extremely close friends, if you know what I mean. I love my husband, my girlfriend and my boyfriend. We are all professional, "normal" people and like I said, you would just never guess that any of us have this interesting, really wonderful part of our lives. I often wonder who else is like us. I know we're not the only ones. Our situation always reminds me that you can think that you really know someone but the vast majority of the time, you don't.

Anonymous said...

i like the post above mine

Anonymous said...

Had a gf for 4 years and NO ONE knew, now she has died do to a sudden death and I feel bad that I was hiding her. And now ppl wonder why I am grieving the way I am over only just a friend. She more, and I loved her!

Anonymous said...

I kind of hate that everyone argues/whines about whose turn it is to sleep with me - even my husband (not at all pertaining to sex). One child uses me like a body pillow and I can't stand being crowded. The other child flops like a decked fish so I get knees in my back, arms flung across my chest or sometimes elbowed in the face. My husband snores like a freight train (to which he says I just need to adapt!!). I want to sleep ALONE in the middle of the bed, surrounded only by my silent, supportive pillows :(

Anonymous said...

amen to that

Anonymous said...

I'm afraid my boys are on the spectrum

Anonymous said...

My confession? I had another confession and was afraid I would screw up the ANON thing, so wimped out and typed this instead.

Anonymous said...

My SO would make a great dad, but he's terrified of having children because his father was abusive. So I know that if I want us to have a child, it's going to have to be an accident on his part.

I stopped taking my birth control pills last month. Pretended to have a UTI so my SO would think I was on antibiotics. Said I was taking my BBT "to make sure I wasn't ovulating due to the antibiotics".

He believed me and had absolutely no idea how on earth I managed to get pregnant.

I lost the baby. I'm agnostic, he's quite religious. Maybe his god is punishing me? I don't know. But I do know that my scheme isn't going to work again anytime soon and I am PISSED about it.

Anonymous said...

I just want to scream @ my husband: Will you fucking leave already?

I know he doesn't love me. I have turned into a huge, fat, depressed bitch who can't handle anything any more. He never has sex with me, he never shows me affection, he criticizes everything I do, he hates what I cook, etc.

Why the hell does he stay? I think he wants me to leave so he can be a martyr like his fucking mother! "Poor me, my wife left me"
He also stays cause where else can you get a fucking maid for free?

I am so done with him! I want to start living for me.

Anonymous said...

@ 8.40am - LEAVE HIM IMMEDIATELY!

Anonymous said...

I hacked my enemy's email and now read it regularly.

Also, I hate when my husband won't go to bat for us regarding his employer. Pussy.

Anonymous said...

My first husband left me for another woman.
I then got pregnant by my boyfriend and had an abortion at 31 years old.
I married the boyfriend.
Now I can't get pregnant again.
Punishment? I think so.
My current husband wants a baby.
I don't really want a baby, in fact, when I think about it, I get panic attacks.

Anonymous said...

I hate where I live. My best friend is turning into a major bitch. I have no motivation other than it's impossible to sleep all day. I love my offspring, but all kids get on my nerves.

Anonymous said...

I don't love my mother. In fact, I don't even like her very much. Luckily, she doesn't seem to like me or my kids either so we don't see her all that much anyways.

I still feel guilty.

Anonymous said...

I want to start all over again. Take the baby, leave the DH and go somewhere where they'll never think of looking for me. Dye my hair, change my name, and never have to deal with this life again.

Anonymous said...

I think my husband is using abstinence as birth control because he's so scared of us losing another baby.

Anonymous said...

this anon thread is boring. i miss the drama of these posts from previous months. anyone out there agree???

Anonymous said...

I'm in a really bad mood today. My husband conveniently 'forgot' to set the alarm clock and we overslept, leaving our 2 year old and 6 month old screaming in their rooms where we could not hear them because, newsflash, they were starving. My husband couldn't get his butt in gear today so we couldn't go to the farmer's market (again, for the fourth time). Why is it he can't do crap on weekends yet he's so damned driven to leave the house in the mornings during the week?

Also, my mother is visiting us. I asked a friend with a guest room to let her stay there because we don't have extra space and need our living room at night to soothe the baby. I've since come to the realization that she comes to visit us only because there are new places to shop up here. It pisses me off that we're not even vaguely interesting enough to see, just the excuse for her to come here. She's shown up at my home the past three mornings after 11am, noon, and today 1pm and left again by 8:30pm. I know she gets up early every morning and stays up late at night. She sees my kids for maybe a couple hours after naptime and before bedtime. She doesn't really interact with them at all, coos a bit at the baby, holds her awkwardly and comfortlessly. Doesn't really seem to have any interest in the older one at all. She mostly likes buying them crap they don't need and that we hate. She stayed an extra day to go to the swap meet to buy more crap that she doesn't need and will never use. Yeah, she does our dishes, but it aggravates me that she eats my delicious cooking with such a suspicious look on her face.

And what pisses me off the most? She blames her memory (which is just fine) on the fact she consistently calls my daughter the wrong name. I know she doesn't like my daughter's name, she made quite the face when we told her what we were going to call her and asked why we couldn't call her a different name. Guess what, Mom, you don't get to pick your grandkids' names. And I don't care if she doesn't like it, she's allowed her opinion and I respect that but that doesn't give her the right to try to re-name our child. She get righteously pissy when I call her on it. Aaargh!

Anonymous said...

I used to stay late at work and lied to my husband about it. Not because I was having an affair, I wasn't. I was reading fanfic online and relishing my alone time.

Anonymous said...

@6:38 I think we have the same mother. For some strange reason I thought she'd want to spend time with her grandkids. Not so much.

Anonymous said...

My daughter is depressed and possibly might be having suicidal thoughts. I've taken her to a conselor and he put her on antidepressent meds, but warned me that sometimes the antidepressents can cause adolescents to have suicidal thoughts and impulses. She doesn't seem to be getting any better and I just don't know what to do. I was very depressed at her age and I can see that I've passed it on to her now.

Anonymous said...

Last Sunday night, I had sex twice. During the first time, the condom fell off inside of me, but I didn't know it -- after, I thought he had just taken it off once we finished and I hadn't noticed.

Wednesday, the condom fell out of me. I was shocked, and scared about both infection and pregnancy risks.

I went to the ER. They examined me, diagnosed me with a small infection, and strongly recommended I take the morning after pill even though it was 96 hours after sex.

It was so fucking hard to decide whether or not to take the pill.

I can't have a baby right now, I just can't. Can't. I'm nowhere near ready for one. If I say any more, it'll give away who I am.

But I was also scared of what the pill would do to me inside (it has some weird side effects) -- I'm terrified that I won't be able to have kids some day, which I want more than anything in the world. (I'm not on birth control pills because I think anything messing up your reproductive system is stupid.)

I took the pill.

I feel guilty.

I know that so many women here want babies and can't have them or are having trouble having them.

I could have not taken the pill, and if I were to have gotten pregnant I could have given the baby up for adoption to fulfill some other woman's dreams.

I also don't feel as guilty as I think I should. That may be the biggest part of my confession.

I don't regret taking the pill.

I just hope to god that it doesn't make me infertile. Karma...please, please, please stay away.

Anonymous said...

@8:47, for what little it's worth, I've taken that pill some years ago (the exact circumstances I've forgotten) and my fertility has not been affected.

Anonymous said...

I have suicidal thoughts and tendencies and I cut. Even though they're getting really prominent, I don't bother covering my scars half the time because no one notices anyway. The only reason my parents would be concerned is because that would make me an even bigger screw up to them. I've even stopped telling my friends because I hate how they react and don't want to impose. I've attempted suicide before and I'm contemplating it now. I have absolutely no control over my moods and I'm scared to death to get help. I'm 13 years old.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that 6:51 should be worrying and she should be monitoring her child. Please, don't let her end up like me.

Anonymous said...

i just got out of a mental hospital. now at another facility that helps you transition back into normal life and i wish i didn't have to make that transition...

Anonymous said...

I hate saying this. I do. But I really wonder how many of these are fake. I can't help but think certain ones are.

Anonymous said...

Sometimes I wish my child were "typical" and then I want to cry because I feel like a horrible mom. And sometimes I'm jealous of other people for having "typical" kids and then I feel like a horrible person.

Anonymous said...

My dad is drinking himself to death, my brother is suicidal and my mom's family has a horrible history with cancer and she smokes like a chimney. I have been preparing myself for their deaths since I was a child. I already know what I'm going to do with their cremains. I take hundreds of pictures whenever I see them, and I always say "I love you" just in case it's the last time I see them.

I'm pretty sure this is not normal.

Anonymous said...

The fake ones are probably the boring ones - lives are so much more screwed up than any of us want to believe sometimes.

But that was awfully well-written for a distraught 13 year old. Then again, I was awfully well-written for a distraught 13 year old. I think I've lost that over the years.

That having been said, Possibly Very Well-Written 13 Year Old: Don't kill yourself. Your whole life will be full of ups and downs, awesomeness and bullshit, but the highs have so far been worth the lows. I know how tempting and easy suicide seems - and hey, it IS - but there's usually just one small thing you can come up with to live for, even if it's only curiosity. Maybe that bitch cheerleader in the grade ahead of you will get knocked up AND walk into a locker and break her nose... do you really want to miss that?

This does seem like a fairly tame confession post.

Anonymous said...

I think most IF bloggers are whingey.

Anonymous said...

I think most of these posts are a load of crap.

And to the fertiles who want to kill their kids, hate their kids, or generally think infertiles are "whingey" (whatever the fuck that means): count your fucking blessings, then drop-the-fuck dead.

Anonymous said...

@6.38 calm down sweetie. i said IF bloggers not all infertiles.

p.s. how's that anger working out for you?

Anonymous said...

Melancholia runs in my family. My mother attempted suicide when I was 15. Scared the shit out of me. I was totally convinced she would do it again and succeed. I watched her like a hawk for years afterward. She's now a slightly depressed 80 year old.

Fast forward forty years from my mother's attempt. My younger brother put a bullet in his brain. No one saw it coming. No note. No nothing.

To anyone with suicidal thoughts. Please, please get help. Talk to someone - anyone, a friend, a teacher, but don't suffer in silence. As 12:18 P.M. stated, life is full of "awesomeness and bullshit" and it really is worth the ride.

Anonymous said...

my husband and I are also swingers, sometimes with people we know, sometimes with people we meet off the internet. and we love it!

Anonymous said...

@8:27- do you do a health check on the people from the internet? how does that work? very interesting. :)

Anonymous said...

@9:14 - people from the internet are always "safe" partners (condoms) but of course we do ask questions. I guess you know as much about them as you do about someone you pick up in the bar. But on-line, you know everyone is looking for the same thing before you get home ;)

there are websites for Adults to help you Find Friends if you know what I'm saying, which is how we "meet" people.

Anonymous said...

I believe, like, 10% of these confessions.
I think the rest are drunk teenagers. Which is kind of awesome--hey, Niobe, you have your finger on the pulse of young people! Or you are the pulse where they lay their fingers.

Anonymous said...

hey, don't make fun of drunk teenagers... we're people too. :)

Kris said...

6:51 PM - My mom knew I was depressed. She didn't know I cut myself. Sometimes I wish that I had had the courage to tell her - but I never did. Please, don't give up on trying to help - watch your kid like a hawk. Take her to a different counselor, try a different medication, just let her know that you're THERE and that you UNDERSTAND. Share some of your own stories. And please know that there's hope.

I'm 24 now. I don't cut myself anymore. I'm still depressed but getting better every day. My mom has stood by me every step of the way and I'll never be more thankful for anything than I am for that.

I'm not afraid of posting of who I am; I'm not going to post anonymously. Chin up, mom at 6:51. It'll be okay. Drop me a line on my blog if you would like more personal experience/etc.

Anonymous said...

@12:02 PM. You're human. You have a hard, life-long job with little to no time off. Yes, there are a lot of rewards but it takes a lot of strength and you're allowed to get tired. While I'm sure you love your child fully, it's not hard to dream about how easy it would be if he wasn't so unique. I'm sure you have a lot of challenges that most other parents don't have to consider and it's normal to be a bit envious. Doesn't mean you love your kid any less. You're not a horrible mom. You're not a horrible mom to your child to have these thoughts. And you're not a horrible person.

Anonymous said...

I'm still very curious about the "blog that no one talks about anymore and mysteriously disapeared" a couple months ago. I hate not knowing if it was real or fake.

Anonymous said...

Anon 12:31--that one and the yu.mmy mu.mmy cum da.ncing in the rain one. It's sad any way you look at it.

Anonymous said...

I am exceptionally happily married to a wonderful person with whom I share a wonderful life and two gorgeous children, but I still have an enormous crush on my best friend, who is a guy. I would never, ever do anything about it, but it's there.

Anonymous said...

I spent the last two weekends in my slippers and bathrobe and enjoyed it even though I also felt like a lazy slob.

Anonymous said...

I think most people who home school are keeping their children from learning all that they need. Or giving them a horribly skewed view of life.

Anonymous said...

When my son was a baby one of my infertile friends would call me during the day to ask how I was doing. Ds had very bad reflux/colic and the meds didn't really help him so I was getting almost no sleep at all. If said I was tired, frusterated, or anything other then great she'd give me the "at least you can get pregnant guilt trip" I prayed for her to get pregnant which she did but I also prayed that she would have an uncomfortable pregnancy and a difficult baby which she did. The big confession is that I was happy every time she complained about how hard it was or how tired she was. Her preg was never in danger and like my son her's didn't have any lasting medical issues but I was so glad she didn't have it easy after the way she treated me when my son was a baby.

Anonymous said...

I've always had a really strong urge to be with a woman. I'm married, and I would never want my husband to join us...I would just like to try it out all by myself.

Anonymous said...

What was the drama with the yum.my mu.mmy?

Anonymous said...

I, too, don't quite understand how someone can continue bemoaning being childless without doing whatever it takes to have a child. I can almost understand as there were many times I wanted to give up and a logical decision to give up doesn't work with your emotional side.

Still, if it is that important, why not keep trying? One blogger I like . . . I sometimes want to say, "Compared to me, you hardly even got started! Keep trying or move on already!"

Anonymous said...

Sick of sensitive people, suck it up people and get over it!

Anonymous said...

ny folks got divorced like 33 years ago. They fought a lot about dumb stuff. I never understood why. My mom said when I was grown up and married, I'd understand how hard it was.

I'm now middle aged,and have been married for almost 2 decades, and I still don't understand what their problem was. I still feel like they ruined my childhood for nothing.

Anonymous said...

@4:25 who wants to be with a woman:

try it! i have been (before i got with my male SO), and i've discovered that i love BOOBS!

Anonymous said...

I'm the one that has a very close relationship with the other couple (my husband and me both) and I think that's what originally led us (both of us women) to it...wanting to be with a woman.

We also were swingers for a very short time before this. What we have now is more though and without the health risks.

Anonymous said...

With all STDs and know what cant be check for 6 months and that only IF they had not had sex that whole 6 months, why would you risk it if you have a family?

Anonymous said...

Is anyone still reading this comment thread? I'm actually looking for advice... yesterday I accidentally found out my husband had googled "na.ked che.erlaede.rs" (only spelled correctly) on our shared iTo.uch. wtf? I have NO idea what to make of this, or if I should even talk with him about it. This was totally out of the blue, for me.

Anonymous said...

Anon @ 5:17--she apparently kept getting these mean emails and went off--it was right after her baby died and people were questioning if she was ever pregnant. Some of the things she said were implausible. For instance, she said that she had 5 dozen balloons in her car to release for her son. I can barely fit a dozen helium balloons in my car. There is no way I could fit 5 dozen. Just some of the things she said lacked verisimilitude, like the woman who lost the three. I never heard anything again...

Anonymous said...

@7:55--looking isn't really a problem, in my opinion.

Anonymous said...

@7:55- sounds like he's just looking. but i don't know why he would do it where you'd find it. maybe he hopes it turns you on too? maybe you could both look at the pictures together and then get revved up and be together? i don't know. if it bothers you, you could ask him about it. but try not to be judgy and rude. if you can, tell him it turns you on too and i bet he'd take you right there. ;)

Anonymous said...

I know this sounds lame, but my secret is that I'm going bankrupt. It's hard to admit and it feels like an utter failure, but it is reality. We also lost our house to foreclosure and live in an apartment now and have junky cars. What a difference than 1 year ago.

Anonymous said...

My husband and I got stoned last night and had the best sex. It's been years since we smoked pot. It was FABULOUS.

Anonymous said...

My husband and I got stoned last night and had the best sex. It's been years since we smoked pot. It was FABULOUS.

Anonymous said...

My husband and I got stoned last night and had the best sex. It's been years since we smoked pot. It was FABULOUS.

Anonymous said...

My husband and I got stoned last night and had the best sex. It's been years since we smoked pot. It was FABULOUS.

Anonymous said...

@9:33 am: We are in the same boat. I am embarrassed by how far we have fallen. Just a few years ago, we were living it up, now we go from paycheck to paycheck. We lost our house, but gave it back willingly because the bank was such a shitbag. We lost two cars. And have a douchebag of a lawyer to boot. Fun times.

Anonymous said...

i'm 9:33, thanks 9:30. at least we're not alone.

Anonymous said...

I can never decide who I need to be with, relationship wise. Sex with guys is easier and I like it, but I miss emotional connections with girls (I can't seem to forge them with guys). Plus I love boobs and being held by girls.

This is quite trivial in the grand scheme of things...but it's occupying my mind as of late, so I thought I'd (anonymously) put it out into the blogosphere.

Anonymous said...

As I approach menopause, I know I will miss my periods because they gave me an excuse to not have sex.

Anonymous said...

I teach and I am so disgusted by the parent's selfishness I can barely speak. Yes, alot of it is what they consider looking out for their child. But really calling me because your child was upset about a game of tag?
The word neither revolves around you or child. The sooner you both assimilate this fact, the better for all involved.

Anonymous said...

I like when teachers try to use big words like assimilate, yet ignore the most basic of all grammatical rules: neither/nor and either/or. It's teachers like you that I dread coming across every year. I'm a teacher as well, and it just irritates me to no end when a fellow teacher tries to criticize parents for showing an interest in their child. I cannot tell you how many parents I see who just DON'T CARE. I would much rather see a overly-concerned parent than one who seems neglectful and absent. Maybe you picked the wrong profession if you don't enjoy dealing with people.

Anonymous said...

I read all of you lovely women because in the back of my head I know that having children will never be easy for me, and in a way I am preparing myself for the worst.

Anonymous said...

Okay, so I'm a couple of weeks behind commenting on this, and there's a bit of backstory, but here goes. I'm 27. A couple of years ago was the era in my life when it seemed everyone I knew was getting married. Now, friends are still getting married, and so many friends are having babies. I am so lonely. I haven't had a boyfriend in years, and I haven't had sex in over a year. I'm not super "I need to get married!" and I don't plan to try having kids until I am at least 30. I didn't go to college for my MRS degree. It would, however, be nice to have a relationship with someone, to give and receive some affection.

My dear friend, male, who lives across the country, recently came to visit. He, too, is a longtime single. We had a wonderful two weeks of spending time together, reminiscing, and lamenting our lives. However, he spent a lot of time discussing how lonely and bothered by his singlehood he is. He always thought he'd be married by now, have kids, told me about his three "backup" friends from childhood. You know, the ones where you promise if you're both still single by X age you'll marry each other? His future and his bachelorhood were obviously on his mind.

Since he returned to his home, all I can think about is him. He's a wonderful person, and we are so comfortable together, but I've never before thought of him in any perspective other than friend-as-close-as-family. I've known him over half my life, and we keep in regular contact. Now, I find myself fantasizing about hauling stakes and moving cross-country to be with him. My job is not a problem, I rent an apartment, and our dogs got along famously while he was here.

Is it just my hormones, kick-started by having such a great time with someone with a Y-chromosome, coupled with my irritatingly enduring solitude that are making my so focused on this? I'm so incredibly scared at the idea of bringing up the scenario with him, because although I feel like I can tell him anything, and he's intimated much the same to me, I am so afraid of his rejection. I am so afraid of losing any part of our relationship as it is to a potential awkwardness. He's been there for over half my life! I've never been much of an initiater, either.

So my summaried confession is that I think I'm in love with a man who is basically my best friend, and I know we could make each other happy, and I know that he is lonely and looking for someone to have a relationship with, and I am stricken with fear at the thought of confessing this to him.

Anonymous said...

@10:28- I think maybe he was saying that stuff to try to feel you out and see if you felt the same way. Like plant the seed, you know? I'd ask him. You could say, "I had such a great time with you while you were here. It got me thinking that maybe we wouldn't be a back match up. What do you say?" I wonder if you did it in an email if it would be easier for him to sort his feelings before answering you? Or is that too impersonal? Hard to say. If he says no, at least you won't have to wonder your whole life if he was the one who got away. I say go for it! It could be just what you both are looking for! :)

Anonymous said...

OK, I'm not so smooth. I meant to say, "maybe we wouldn't be a GOOD match up". Don't know where back came from. :)

Anonymous said...

11/22 10:28 p.m.

Please let us know what happens. I'm hoping for you!